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A group of hardore Buglers decided one day to go through each Bugle and list down the the memorable, jokes, phrases, puns, and moments of the Bugle and now this dream is becoming a reality.

Long jokes have the start time next to them.

Contents

Reoccurring Jokes/CharactersEdit

  • The American: Ep. 2, 7, 14, 15, 19, 23, 27, 33, 42, 50, 55, 63, 87, 99, 109, 139, 158a
  • Hugo Chavez News: Ep. 5, 7
  • Pun runs Ep. 48, 117 (Dog Puns), 126 (Pasta Puns), 133 (Asian Country Puns), 170 and 171 (Greek Puns), 172 (Latin Writers), 213 (US Presidents)
  • John Singing Ep.14, 33, 80.5 (Regulate) 85 (Holding Out for a Hero), 100 (Enter Sandman), 113 (Puppy Love), 114 (Anarchy in the UK), 126 (Let's Talk About Sex), 154 (Bump n' Grind)...
  • Andy calling Jesus guilty Ep. 4
  • Mentioning the Guru. Ep.

Issue 1: How like Vietnam is Iraq?Edit

  • "If you really want to know how many balls to say Iraq is like Vietnam, it takes 3 balls" -John
  • "There are more suicides during party confrences then at any other time of the year. That is a lie but my point stands." -Andy
  • "A lot of people marry for love I think this is weak..." 10:01
  • Armenia and the Genocide that wasn't... 12:13
  • Andy's missing bin in the letter of St. Paul.... 13:46
  • "The issue of human rights is more difficult than before because, there are more humans in the world, but unfortunatly there are the same numbers of rights to go around, so don't blame the government, blame maths." -Andy
  • Crisp manufacturers putting to much salt in crisps... 22:27
  • One song ipod.... 24:24
  • Terrorist literature choice... 26:34

Issue 2: The Empire Strikes BackEdit

  • "We (Britain) did far, far worse things than America could even dream of doing, But we did it with a certain gentle manly swagger" John
  • Antarctica fact box
  • "We claimed we are going in there for scientific research,we just want to scientifically research how much oil we can get out of there, and maybe scientifically research how much money we can get paid for that oil. I don't see whats so hard for them to understand, there are going to be graphs.. There are going to be graphs.
  • Swearing Spectacular
  • First appearance of The American 15:00
  • Johnny Wilkinson RWC world cup comentary 23:36
  • Woles first appearance for the Tantrum Throwing Competition 25:44

Issue 3: California's BurningEdit

  • Global Warming is unamerican ....2:03 (Main Story)
  • Al Gore Ruler of the earth...3:07
  • "These are the greatest days for exaggerations in the history of planet earth" John
  • Andy's first exchange rate joke...8:05
  • "Like an hungry South African carnivore, spotting a sausage shop down a side street, things have taken a turn for the wurst" Andy's first Pun.
  • Belt Busting Breakfast Burrito...13:50
  • Martin Yole's unbelievable Pressure routine... 20:19

Issue 4: Immigrant's SongEdit

  • Main story: Immigration Eveywhere... 1:55-12:18
    • Tabloids reporting on a woman smuggling in immigrants in her stomach... 3:22
    • Immigration factbox ...5:10
  • Writers Guild strike: Andy makes a joke, labeled scab... 14:20
  • Donald Rumsfeld's snowflakes / bumper stickers... 15:22
  • Bugle Comment!: Westboro Baptist Church picketing soldier's funerals... 19:25
    • "Do they hate gay people? Yes, yes they do. I think they've proven that time and time again. Do they hate gay people to the tune of $11 million?" -John
  • Bugle Newsfeature on Fuel/Biofuel/Alternative Enegry... 21:17
    • "In Britian, we've always been pioneers of alternative energies and we were the first nation in the world to use Catholics as a fuel. Fact." -Andy
  • First instance of Andy calling Jesus guilty
  • Travel Supplement!: Why not visit Pakistan this week?... 29:00

Issue 5: 110 Per Cent Behind MusharrafEdit

  • Bush tells Musharaf to relinquish control of the army...3:52
  • Musharaf sarcastic slamming...4:40
  • Pakistan quiz...5:15
  • "What part of gift of democracy are these people struggling to understand!" -John
  • Andy's first suggestive complement of the queen...9:17
  • "It is the queens english, if she wants it to sound nasal and boring, nasal and boring it must sound."- John
  • Second exchange rate joke...
  • "You can't put a price on a statement like that... well you can and that is 240,000 pounds"- John (on Tony Blairs speech in China)
  • King Juan Carlos of Spain tell Hugo Chavez to shut up.... 15:24
  • Food scares and dangerous toys...16:23
  • Date Rape Toys...18:42
  • Total and Utter Fighting Championships...26:54

Issue 6: OPEC: Let's talk oil and fiery rhetoricEdit

Issue 7: 25 million people missingEdit

  • ====Main Story: UK government loses 25 million peoples files in the post. 02:14====
  • Andy: The Queen should cut her own head off! 05:38
  • John: "I shred the leftovers of every meal I eat, it's messy but it's safe." 07:40
  • ====Next Story: Phenominal drop in violence in Iraq 08:55====
  • John: "The Whitehouse does now seem to be using the Presidents incompetence as its sole defence." 10:58
  • Hugo Chavez News 10:58
  • Juan Carlos telling Chavez to 'Shut up' becomes spanish ringtone.
  • ====Ask an American! 15:55====
  • ====Sport: English football is dead. 23:25 ====
  • Commemorative boo 25:47
  • Audio cryptic crossword: 24 across 28:30
  • Bugle Forecast 29:12

Issue 8: Austrailians keep touching the QueenEdit

Issue 9: Iran: Nukes or No Nukes?Edit

Issue 10: Have an Adequate ChristmasEdit

Issue 10A: The Very Best (so far!)Edit

Issue 11: After Iowa, only 302 days left to goEdit

Issue 12: Bush brings yet more chaos to the Middle EastEdit

Issue 13: After 433 years Sark finally gets democracyEdit

Issue 14: Money, Money, MoneyEdit

John sings money by Rick James (01:42)

Main Story (01:55)Edit

Is the world on the brink of economic meltdown?Edit

  • Another exchange rate joke (03:10)
  • John "The US sneezed its economic balls off" (03:55)
  • John "The french could be the most powerful people in the world if they all kept themselves to themselves" (08:35)

Resignation News (08:40)Edit

  • Andy "£100000 could buy a seventeen second long presidential campaign" (10:08)

Middle East Update (11:00)Edit

  • Gaza goes on an explosive shopping trip

Mitt Romney factbox (12:50)Edit

  • Andy "If you do get in a wrestling match with a pig, these are the steps you should take. ..." (16:33)

Ask an American! (17:22)Edit

EmailsEdit

  • John announces he is a 'complete convert' to Hotties from History (26:05)
  • Mother Teresa Hotties Nomination (28:36)

Bugle SportEdit

Issue 21: Swearing at the Queen!Edit

Issue 24: Was Stonehenge an ancient taxdodge?Edit

THE BEST EMAIL EVER!

Issue 25: John loves the PopeEdit

Issue 26: Food! Nonexistent Food!Edit

Issue 27: The Swimsuit EditionEdit

Issue 28: Dead Hill WalkingEdit

Issue 29: Adults and AliensEdit

Issue 30: Volcano PornEdit

Issue 31: Sharon Stone fludges her pontulliusEdit

Issue 32: Obama and KSMEdit

Issue 33: George Bush: 'Regrets? I've had a few'Edit

Issue 34: You Will Know Us By Our Knobbly FruitEdit

"If you were a biscuit, what type of biscuit would you be?"

"If you wern't a cunt, what type of job would you have?"

Issue 35: Barack Obama and his disappearing change hatEdit

Issue 35*: Independence Day SpecialEdit

Issue 36: Oil Prices, recession & inflation but what do the G8 do? Have an 18 course mealEdit

Issue 37: Barack Obama is coming to Europe!Edit

Issue 38: Karadzic's Scooby Doo disguiseEdit

Issue 39: McCain, Andy and John plumb new depths with their Obama attack adEdit

Issue 40: Osama Bin Laden's taxi driverEdit

Issue 41: Russia gets gold at Olympic sport of invasionEdit

Issue 42: An Olympics SpecialEdit

Issue 43: Democratic convention specialEdit

Issue 44: Republican Convention SpecialEdit

Issue 44.1: The sub-issue you've all been waiting forEdit

Issue 45: Help Save The Investment BankerEdit

Issue 46: Economic Armageddon ApproachethEdit

Issue 47: Sarah Palin- One giant leap backwards for humankindEdit

Issue 48: How Low Will They Go?Edit

Issue 49: Joe the plumber now regrets chatting to Barack ObamaEdit

Issue 50: US Election nearly over!Edit

Issue 51: Let it all be over soon!Edit

Issue 52: Spoiler alert! Obama wonEdit

Issue 53: Obama and his not so secret code nameEdit

Issue 54: The Vegas SpecialEdit

Issue 55a: The Thanksgiving SpecialEdit

Issue 55: Shooting One's Own LegEdit

Issue 56: Selling Barack Obamas seatEdit

Issue 57: Hats off to Obama shoes off for BushEdit

Issue 58: What Did you get for Xmas? Peace In The Middle East?Edit

Issue 59: Why Obama's inauguration will be like the Rio carnivalEdit

Issue 60: Goodbye George Hello BarackEdit

Issue 61: Obama Inauguration SpecialEdit

Issue 62: Obama and his do nothing wonderlandEdit

Issue 63: Foreign Snow Invades BritainEdit

Issue 64: Bankers pretend to apologiseEdit

Issue 64 Appendage 1: The new webpage guided tourEdit

Issue 65: Will Obamas stimulus revive the world economy? Who caresEdit

Issue 66: Brown gets rubbish present from ObamaEdit

Issue 67: Monkey News Special!Edit

Issue 68: Obama and his Al Qaeda Style VideoEdit

Issue 69: Possibly the longest penis joke in the world, everEdit

Issue 70: G-G-G-G-G-GEEEE 20Edit

Issue 70.1: Supplementary Easter EggEdit

Issue 71: Torture and Dictators specialEdit

Issue 72: The Real Swine Flu VaccineEdit

Issue 73: Are the Taliban skiing down the Swat Valley?Edit

Issue 74: Claiming expenses for MPs that do not existEdit

Issue 75: What to do with Gitmo let fear decideEdit

Issue 76: Calling out North KoreaEdit

Issue 77: Gordon Brown gets a bad dose of the quitsEdit

Issue 78: Apathy or the far right Europe decidesEdit

Issue 79: Iranian election specialEdit

Issue 80: Iran, pick on a country your own size!Edit

Issue 80 point 5: Independence Day SpecialEdit

Issue 81: The G8 the world's slowest superheroesEdit

Issue 82: Freedom of Speech SpecialEdit

Issue 83: Obama pay for this or you will be deadEdit

Issue 84: Future SpecialEdit

Issue 85: I need a hero! Bill Clinton goes to North KoreaEdit

Issue 86: Burma triumphs in made up crime preventionEdit

Issue 87: Afghanistan celebrates election with fireworks or gunsEdit

Issue 88: Iran and its glitzy show trialsEdit

Issue 88.1: Travel SectionEdit

The Bugle is still on holidayEdit

Issue 89: Good Health Bad HealthEdit

Issue 90: Bring on the crazy, Gaddafi!Edit

Issue 91: Happy Birthday Communist ChinaEdit

Issue 92: Obama wins first preemptive Nobel Peace PrizeEdit

Issue 93: Peak Oil SpecialEdit

Issue 94: Does the EU really want El Presidente BlairEdit

Issue 94 and a half: Autumn VacationEdit

Issue 95: Walls Wars and PowerEdit

Issue 96: Two Star Review for this year's Queen's SpeechEdit

Issue 96A: Thanksgiving for BerlusconiEdit

Issue 97: Bad News for Stupid Buildings, Afghanistan and shoesEdit

Issue 98: Britant can no longer afford defence against aliensEdit

Issue 99: Berlusconi takes a cathedral to the faceEdit

Issue 99A: The Best of 99 BuglesEdit

Issue 99B: The Bugle Musical SpecialEdit

Issue 100: The 100th EpisodeEdit

Issue 101: Barack Obama and how to lose hope and irritate peopleEdit

Issue 102: Why the global economy is like elvisEdit

Issue 103: Climate change denial and Narnia of nutcasesEdit

Issue 104: Valentines Day SpecialEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 104a: Where is John?Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 105: Back off our islands Argentina!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 106: The American right to flip the birdEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 107: An Ethics SpecialEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 108: Eyes on AfricaEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 109: In Rude HealthEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 110: Britain Holds Its BreathEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 111: Some Seroiously Bad Pope-ingEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 112: Birthday Party! Super Best Friends Invited!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 113: Countdown to Vote-ageddonEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 114: Waking Up In A Different BritainEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 115: Five more years of thisEdit

Link to mp3

The Bugle: Recent Decents - May 2010Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 116: Freeze The OilEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 117: She bored'er colleaguesEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 118: World Cup SpecialEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 119: Oil Never Dot It AgainEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 120: McChrystal BallsEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 121: I spy with my little eye..Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 122: Donald Trump in dragEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 122a: History of the World Part 1Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 122b: History of the World Part 2Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 122g: History of the World Part 3Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 122d: History of the World Part 4Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 123: That clock is pimped out!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 124: Brazilliant!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 125: Donor FatigueEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 126: Let's talk about peace, babyEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 127: 12 Friends and 1 ChampionEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 128: UN-couthEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 129: Kim Jong UnbelievableEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 130: Fire SaleEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 131: A Miner CelebrationEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 132: Massive CutsEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 132 and a bit: Cut for a reasonEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 132 and an old bit: No BugleEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 133: Backwang ForeverEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 134: Royal Wedding Souvenir EditionEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 135: Kim Jong il-conceivedEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 136: Do I Not Leak ThatEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 137: Crazies SpecialEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 138: A Christmas Bugle!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 138a: More Old GoldEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 138b: Review of 2010Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 139: *Spoiler alert* 2011 Preview SpecialEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 140: The Divorce of a NationEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 141: Tunisia is RevoltingEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 142: Egypt EruptsEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 143: Egypt crisis - a good time to buy a jumperEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 144: No Going MubarakEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 144a: Lowlights 2011Edit

  • "Some shit bits that weren't good enough to go on recent shows" - Andy
  • (19:20) Chris says that Andy and John don't love us as much as he does, and he can "barely, barely hold back the contempt I have for you at the best of times". Fuck you Chris.

Link to mp3

Issue 145: Libyeah or LibynaEdit

  • First ever Bugle from Asia, first Bangalore Bugle.
  • British imperialism bit
  • 400 Years to the day since Swiss King Olaf The Weird inadvertently discovered skiing
  • As many Bugles as flavors of ice cream at John the Baptist's 5th birthday party
  • Top Story: Unrest Update; Libyikes!
  • Gaddafi bits
  • "[Gaddafi] is like Puff Daddy or Madonna, Andy. When you've been in power for as long as he has, you have to keep re-inventing yourself so that you stay relevant and people don't get bored" - John
  • Silvio Berlusconi news (23:45)
  • "We've all got our Hosni Mubarak excuses" - Andy
  • Leadership birthday news (26:20)
  • Robert Mugabe turned 87 this week. Sent a cermonial 87 "fuck you"s from the rest of the planet
  • Uganda news (28:10)
  • Bugle feature section: travel! (30:05)
  • British imperialism reference

Link to mp3

Issue 146: Long over-JewEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 146a: Lowerlights 2011Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 147: Man Versus NatureEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 147a: Zaltman, live from DhakaEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 147b: More Salztman, live from DhakaEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 148: Mayhem UpdateEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 149: #crucifybieberEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 150: Royal Wedding PreviewEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 151: Regal BugleEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 152: Compromised to a permanent endEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 153: Wake Up, GaddafiEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 154: Keep it in your pantsEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 155: The Queen is on fire!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 156: Who's Tailin' Palin?Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 157: Reacting like a coiled donutEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 158: Hot Rod & Dragster Strike OutEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 158a: Trully OffalEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 159: Everything Must Go!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 160: News Out Of This WorldEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 161: Hacking: A self esteem issueEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 162: Making a mountain out of a mountainEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 163: Debt To AmericaEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 163a: Too OffalEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 164: Ich Bin Ein HulkmaniacEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 165: Bashar goes to Madcon 1Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 166: Gaddafi's Last Bugle?Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 166a: We're back, AndyEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 166b: This offal tastes funnyEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 166g: Offal EdinburgherEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 167: Berlusconi: Hard to swallowEdit

Link to mp3

Leaders Special #1: Silvio BerlusconiEdit

Link to mp3

Leaders Special #2L Mahmood AhmadinejadEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 168: Streets of RageEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 169: Captain Crazy corks itEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 170: It's time to ban slap bassEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 171: A Greek TragedyEdit

link to mp3

Issue 172: Berlusconi bows outEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 173: Techno! Techno! Technocrat!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 173a: Turkey OffalEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 174: Britain's Back Baby!Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 175: Putin the boot inEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 176: Deep Space NineEdit

Link to mp3

The Best of 2011: Part 1Edit

Link to mp3

The Best of 2011: Part 2Edit

Link to mp3

Issue 177: Weapons of mass electionEdit

Link to mp3

Issue 178: The Final CountdownEdit

Link to mp3

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